The Doubting Voice (A Short Story)
"Time indeed flies so fast," we tell ourselves after seeing the digital calendar. It's already June, the sixth month of the year. We can still remember the atmosphere of Valentines last February or the moment we set our New Year's resolutions. We can even still remember details of last year's Christmas or even our birthday.
Worry begins to creep in, making us think time's running out and we have not accomplished that much yet this year. Take my word for it. Sometimes I find myself entertaining thoughts of doubts and disappointment. I just finished the second draft of my novel last week. It took me longer than I did the first draft. Fortunately, I found my way out of the second-draft hell. For a moment, I blame myself for it. The details we shall forgo for now and save for another story. But I blame myself for taking longer to write the second draft. I have done it before. The second round should've been easier and faster but it did not. I feel guilt, shame, and worthlessness, in that order. Then I stop. I stop.
"Why the hell are you so hard on yourself?" the conversation with myself begins.
"Because I failed," my doubting voice says.
"Uhm. I don't see how you failed baby," the sane one says matter-of-factly.
"Uhm. Hello. You know the truth." The doubting voice tries to imitate the other one, "Baby."
The sane one holds the doubting one's shoulders and shakes his body. "You. Know. The. Truth." He stops. "Don't be stupid."
Light and clarity begin to enter the doubting one's mind. Then everything makes sense. The doubting one doubts no longer. On his place now stands the believer, armoured with faith and hope. With a jolly face he exclaims, "Yeah I was stupid for a while but I know the truth. I know the truth now."
Sometimes in our fixation on the destination we close our eyes to our accomplishments, whether they be big or small, public or private, or tear-jerking or pride-conducing. Instead of acknowledging and celebrating our progress, we choose to focus on our mistakes and failures. It's a sad state of affairs, when the dreamer is his own doubter, when the believer is his own naysayer, and when the fighter is his own enemy. Let us be aware that if we accept the role of the dreamer, believer, or the fighter, being our own antagonist is not acceptable. It will never, ever be acceptable. Before others can celebrate us, we must learn how to celebrate ourselves.
Instead of giving the spotlight on the time it took me to finish my second draft, I should've put the spotlight on the fact that I finished it! Instead of entertaining thoughts of doubts and disappointment, I should've rejoiced with the accomplishments I overlooked: five months of consistent blogging on this website, the great feedback I have been receiving, awesome books I have discovered and read, awesome people from around the people who have been introduced to my life, and my spiritual growth. See! There were so many great things to be happy about and I chose to entertain thoughts of doubts and entertainment.
How did I do it? How was I able to shift from a negative perspective to a positive one. I brought myself back to that important time in my life and measured my progress from there. I brought myself back to my life's "Point of No Return".
WHAT IS THE POINT OF NO RETURN?
The Point of No Return is a critical and important time in a person's lifetime. It's that time when a person finally wakes up, accepts responsibility for everything, makes a vow to live life to the fullest, stops succumbing to fears and insecurities, and becomes his/her own driver in life. The Point of No Return is when a person finally steps away from the shadows that darken life and steps into the path of light, love, and life. The Point of No Return is that moment when a person finally sees the true destination. It's that moment in life when a person stands up and runs to the other direction declaring, "I will never go back. I will never go back." The Point of No Return is the beginning of a new life, a life where all energy is directed to the commitment on living (not just existing and floating idly through life). The Point of No Return is a gift each of us is privileged to own if only we will grab it. The Point of No Return is heaven on earth.
My Point of No Return happened when I, very scared and nervous, wrote the first sentence of my book's first draft. I said to myself, "This is it! No more wishing about it. No more ignoring it and putting it away. No more thinking about it. There's no turning back." It felt like a second birthday, a baptism. It's not just a baptism. My life has benefited so much after finding my Point of No Return.
5 BENEFITS OF FINDING YOUR LIFE'S "POINT OF NO RETURN"
YOU WILL BE SET FREE FROM THE PAST
Finding your Point of No Return will break the shackles of the past on your feet. It doesn't mean you will completely forget about the past. Instead, you will no longer be haunted with its ugly memories. The past will become a book of lessons for you to take on your journey. The past will no longer be destructive for you. It will become a weapon, a strategic advantage, that will be beneficial for you down the road.
People who are imprisoned by the past are pained whenever they revisit it. Whenever they come back to it, these thoughts fill their mind: "I wished I didn't", "If only", "I regret", "I should've, I could've, I would've". After finding your Point of No Return, your thoughts will be filled with these instead: "I will", "I'm excited", "I can do it", "Let's get it on!". You will stop becoming a past-oriented or a past-obsessed person. You will learn how to enjoy the present and look forward to the future.
YOUR LIFE WILL HAVE DIRECTION
Your Point of No Return will close the gates to your past and you will have no opportunity to turn back. But have no fear because when you do find your Point of No Return, it will give your life direction. Never before has your path been clearer for you until you get to your Point of No Return. No longer getting by day after day floating idly and letting the water take you anywhere, you now know where you must go to. Because you know where to go, your time and energy will no longer be spent on trivial things that steer you away from your direction. You will want to stay on course. You will want to remain on track.
YOU WILL BECOME COURAGEOUS AND ENTHUSIASTIC
Your Point of No Return will give you something to aim for. You will gain clarity of your visions and dreams. Because of that you will have something to work for, something to strive for. That ultimate question of "Why?" will finally be answered. Your purpose will be made clearer. Because of that, you'll gain immense confidence and courage that you've never felt before.
You'll wake up every morning excited with the possibilities the new day will bring. You'll leap with joy from your bed to your morning routine and to the rest of your day filled with enthusiasm. Your life will begin to bloom and blossom with energy.
You will also be more attracted to exploring things you haven't explored before, no longer frozen by the fear of new and the unknown. You'll be courageous in facing challenges on your new path. You'll know that fear is the real enemy and you will no longer endure any of its tricks.
YOU WILL BECOME STRONGER
Finding your Point of No Return will make you stronger. You will brim with enthusiasm and courage that you'll take on new and more challenges in your life. Because of that your knowledge and wisdom will expand. Because you will finally know that things will not be handed to you on a silver platter, that you have to work for it, your self-entitlement will disappear. You will stop pointing the blame on things and other people. All of these will make you stronger.
YOUR LIFE WILL BECOME AN ADVENTURE
Because you are no longer shackled by the past, have gained direction in life, have become courageous, enthusiastic, and stronger, you will gain a different perspective of life. Life will no longer be a monotonous, boring routine. You will no longer look at it as a chore to get through, as something difficult with no guarantee of happiness and success. Instead, for you, life will become an adventure, like a video game with increasing levels of difficulties as you progress and tougher villains to battle. But you will not give a damn because video games are fun. Adventure is fun. Life is fun. You will know that going through the challenges is worth it. It's not about the physical rewards. It's about the fulfilment of taking on a challenge and owning it. You will absolutely know that happiness and success can be obtained by overcoming obstacles, exploring new territories, and growing as a person. Life is an adventure. Adventure is life.
Finding your Point of No Return will turn your life around. You will know and feel what it's like to really live when you do. Have you found your Point of No Return already? If not, how do you think you're going to find it?
Subscribe with your best e-mail to receive newsletter and articles like this.
Or connect with your favorite social media platform below!